Divorce ended my marriage but launched a remarkable career

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My design career started with a divorce. Maybe yours did, too?

Once upon a time, I lived in a cute townhome in Seattle with my (now ex) hubby. Newly married, we blissfully picked out paint colors and made the most of our hand-me-down furniture.

Photo of a living room alongside the text "The living room I shared with my ex hubs... once he left everything I looked at seemed to whisper "you failed at marriage." I felt miserable, and stuck."

A few years later, cue the plot twist – our marriage ended. Since I got to keep the house, I spent the first few months after our divorce surrounded by sad memories of my failed marriage, captured in the paint colors, the dishes, the queen bed we’d shared. I’d gone from feeling hopeful and happy at home, to feeling miserable and alone in my space.

I cried.

A lot.

After a while, I decided enough was enough. I got some old paint out of the garage and started slapping it on the walls and ceilings. As you’ll see below, this was a design disaster 😂 – that faux paint treatment was awful, and that black ceiling… yah. But it was a genius life hack!

New photo of the living room, this time with unusual paint colors on the ceiling and walls alongside the text, "Redecorating while angry might not lead to the most timeless design decisions lol... but it's cathartic! It's just paint, and easy to fix!"

That coat of paint broke my space free from the past, and started me on a journey of self-discovery. It was kind of like going to therapy, asking myself what did I want to try and keep from my “old” life, and what did I want my new life to look like? But unlike with traditional therapy, I was able to see the tangible result of my work.

Once the room was liberated, I could finally get intentional about the design. Out with the black and blue nightmare, in with a light, feminine vibe – a “no boys allowed” haven. I snagged a turquoise velvet couch, a pink velvet chair, and a fluffy white rug off Craigslist and created a sweet, feminine sanctuary, perfect for who I was becoming.

Another photo of the living room, with    more cohesive paint colors and new furniture, alongside the text, "A little feminine cocoon! What better space to turn into a butterfly?"

Feeling more secure and settled, I was surprised at how quickly I started to heal. Before I knew it I felt brave enough to date again.

By now I’d become aware of how much my space affected my emotions and my behavior, so I needed one more design chapter. If I was ready to invite people back into my life, I wanted them to feel welcome in my house. The turquoise sofa stayed (obviously, it’s fabulous), but the pinks and purples made way for blues and greens. Less girly, more date-ready – a space that reflected a woman ready for adventure.

A photo of the living room with updated paint colors again and some new furniture, alongside the text, "Still a gal's home, but now boys were allowed in again..."

My home became my cocoon during the craziness of divorce – a place to heal, hide, and eventually emerge with newfound courage for love. And that’s how a Peace Corps alum with a geological sciences degree found herself running an interior design empire. Who knew throw pillows and paint could be world-changers?

The takeaway?

First, there’s no better way to update your life than to have an emotional tornado come through and tear it all to the ground. 🌪️ While I wouldn’t recommend you seek out that kind of emotional tornado 😬 if you’ve found yourself in a life-upside-down moment, know that there is light at the end of the tunnel and that your space can help you get to that light.

Second, if you’ve ever felt like interior design is just an expensive indulgence meant for the wealthy and wish you were doing something more “meaningful” – know that there is power in our work. You have to craft your business model thoughtfully or, yes, you end up being “the help” to some rich person with too much money and too few values. But you can make a difference with this work, and not just by sourcing sustainable materials, or giving back to charity. When you help a home shed its past and embrace a new chapter, it affects every person living in that space. ❤️

Fast forward, I’ve moved on from the townhouse, remarried, and now share a space with the hubs and our cat, Murray in Paris. Life’s a continuous thrill ride!

Here’s to spaces that support us through life’s rollercoasters and make the tough days a tad more bearable.

Like this, and want more?

Check out my book Happy Starts At Home. If you’re a designer it’ll help you start to look at your work through the lens of design psychology, and if you’re a human it’ll help you put the tools of design psychology to work in your home. 💪

May your home always be happy!

Rebecca West interior design business coach

Hi! I’m Rebecca!

I’ve been mentoring designers since 2012, helping them grow as business people, realize their potential, and succeed on their own terms because I believe your design business should make you seriously happy.

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